Sunday, February 24, 2013

14 Lines

© Isadora Gruye



 
I look for her along the tempest sky
   n' whiskey sea
her Glassine eyes open
dusk to moon's tide.

Her siren's song spun me like gypsy gold
outlined my Porcelain sails
my heart cracked like leather.

Landlubber now
my bones sit on our gateway bench

Our journey once
 threaded by silver stars and an indigo atlas
Her winged wisdom now perched
as a mute Swan.


    © Ellen Wilson
  





Over in the Garden-Kerry shared Izy's photos and asked us for 14 lines.  I also thought I would participate in the Poetry Pantry!   Happy Sunday~


50 comments:

  1. I love the line - My heart cracked like leather - great image. Love the picture too. Life is great from a park bench :)

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    Replies
    1. Hi Mametz,
      Yes, it truly can be ;D
      Thank you~

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  2. I think this is just excellent, Ella, both as a response to the photo and to the challenge of writing in 14 lines. You have used some wonderful word combos and I really like the 4 - 3 - 3 - 4 lined stanzas - it makes for an unusually compelling flow of the rhythm.

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    Replies
    1. Kerry,
      I became enchanted with the crossover
      of sea life and landlubbers.
      Thank you so much...
      :D

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  3. Gorgeous, Ella. I especially like: Her siren's song spun me like gypsy gold

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  4. Beautifully wrought, Ella. The last stanza is particularly stunning.

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    Replies
    1. Hi Mary,
      Thank you!
      I left it obscure, so when read it would
      make others wonder ;D

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  5. Replies
    1. Hi Green Speck
      :D thank you so much~

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  6. This is a song, it is so lyrical and flows so beautifully.. terrific!

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    Replies
    1. Hi Mixi
      Thank you-maybe I need to go tune
      my guitar ;D

      Delete
  7. This is truly a lovely poem, a lyrical masterpiece.

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  8. Love all of this, but especially your second stanza. Great imagery,

    Elizabeth

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  9. Ella, a timeless piece of work. A fairytale with strands in real life.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you Aprille!
      Yes, the Little Mermaid did come to shore.
      ;D

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  10. Oh Ella, this is exquisite, so many beautiful, shimmering lines threaded through.

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    Replies
    1. Hi Laura,
      Yes, I had fun writing this one!
      Oh, I love your pretty comment
      :D

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  11. This is lovely, Ella - the porcelain sails and the cracked leather heart - very pretty language and imagery. k.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you! Those sailor types are tough-I know I'm married to one ;D

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  12. I felt as I read this aloud that it's how I feel about growing older. Not ready for the bench yet though...I want to keep sailing. :)

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    1. Yes, keep sailing...the bench is there
      when the time is right!
      I didn't intend for it to be like that, but I can
      see it now!
      I see more layers now~
      Thanks for sharing :D

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  13. Ella,

    A sad poem, but written with great sensitivity. Growing old has its twists and ends.

    A very nice poetic style Ella:)

    Eileen

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    Replies
    1. Hi Eileen,
      I really like your interpretation!
      I was thinking of some of the people
      I know and how difficult their relationships
      are, when they marry a man that goes to sea.

      Thank you~
      :D

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  14. I love "her siren's song spun me like gypsy gold". Beautiful, kiddo!

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    Replies
    1. Thank you Sherry!
      So much gold, unseen in our world~
      People need to open their eyes to the
      true treasures ;D

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  15. "Her winged wisdom now perched
    as a mute Swan..." --WOW!! Beautiful lines, Ella.

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    Replies
    1. Hi Panchali
      I <3 your interview!
      Beautiful!
      Thank you so much
      :D

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  16. a poem of excellent diction and imagery.absolutely wonderful.

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  17. "I look for her along the tempest sky
    n' whiskey sea"...

    Such yearning on a park bench! loved it.

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    Replies
    1. :D Thank you!
      Yes, those park benches instill romantic notions!

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  18. I love it all, but especially "Porcelain Sails...and the final stanza. Excellent.

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    Replies
    1. Hi Willow
      Thank you! I know I thought of delicate, when I used it! :D

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  19. I'm not smart enough to understand all of it, but I sure loved "Glassine eyes." That gave me a very unsettled feeling - and I delight in being unsettled! :-)

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    1. Hi Lexa-I went with that image, because I though everyone would see what they want. Did she drown in his love-lose her sense and place in the world? Or are we talking about him being a widow and she is dying. I liked making everyone wonder! Yes, you are smart enough-it is for you to see what you want!
      I wrote it thinking about my life. I married a sailor-he is in the Navy. Their hearts are tough nuts to crack-they go away for months and have a secret world. It is a delicate balance to live this life. He has been gone seven months than home. A dance of control and trust- Truth-he is retiring soon and I'm trying to find my way. I lost my career in his world, all the moving, and I have dealt with some sickness. Yes, unsettling is the best way to describe it! I'm unsettled about my footing and he is losing his~ ...the bench for me meant reflection. I should name the poem Unsettling :D
      Thanks Lexa!

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    2. I'm glad your hubby will come home soon. Your life has definitely been unsettled, but women are very adaptable. I'm sure you can return to your career or find a new one. My very best wishes for you both! :-)

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